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pigeon days

by birds fear death

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1.
she blacks out when she's drunk and she takes the liquor straight she's got friends in the business that can get you cheap cocaine she doesn't wanna leave so she never takes a break just take her for a ride and you'll never be the same she stays out at the party until there's blood on the walls if you give her fifty dollars you can fuck in the stalls she'll pass out on your couch and wake up in her bed she's got coke in her blood and a gun to her head
2.
would there still be makeup on your dead body would there be hope left in your eyes would there be flowers placed on your gravestone would anybody by surprised birds fear death but i don't
3.
she walked in with a fake id and a bottle of pills for her anxiety i heard her talk about her body count tried to start a conversation i don't know what about her eyes are brighter than the fire she carries you can see the burns on the clothes she's wearing and it made me hope that i could take things slow but she gets so high that she speaks in smoke
4.
bloody nose 03:08
kneel over the glass with a straw in your nose they heard the shots outside so you're laying low and you're scared at how low they'll go and what they'll do for a gram of your blow you're skipping town and skipping class and scraping up the broken glass fake romance to break a half then sell her off to save your ass missed connections that you keep like best friends on your tv screen bridges burned with gasoline and im just trying to come clean keep buying coke make you girlfriend pay walk home with a bloody nose at the end of the day know who's bed you'll wake up in today now im stoned on the side of the road and you're paying him with change high school fights that you start in the halls like the girls that you're cheating in the bathroom stalls you said you blacked out when you missed her calls you're gonna keep it up because you know you'll have it all my head is inside out broken nose and bloody mouth throwing up on someone's couch i know im never coming down and im just as bad as you hungover while you're coming to give up trying to break through cause i know that im dying soon keep buying coke make you girlfriend pay walk home with a bloody nose at the end of the day know who's bed you'll wake up in today now im stoned on the side of the road and you're paying him with change i'll run around look for somewhere to stay crash your car into the side of the school just trying to get away now you knew exactly what i'd say now im standing by the side of your home and im waiting for the rain
5.
take away my reasons to stay and act like they were never there at all i'll quit while i'm ahead gun in my silhouette you'll know i'm free from the note on my wall clip my wings can't hear you sing hit the glass for a second time and fall scream and fight when the mall dies you'll find my bones in a bathroom stall
6.
ground open up beneath my feet swallow me whole leave me to die running out of my medication but at least now i can cry when i lay down in my bed i forget what its like to breathe i told you that i love you so when are you gonna kill me turn your back from me while i drift away i won't be here tomorrow but you're the best thing about today said i'd wait until this season passes do it after i write this song the ocean i'm sinking in is too deep to drown in i'm scared that you'll know when i'm gone i'll lay down in my bed and forget what its like to breathe how many times do i have to say that i love you for you to kill me hold me in your arms while i fade away i won't be here tomorrow but you're the best thing about today
7.
i was wrapped in white wallpaper as my thoughts laid waste to my mind i couldn't feel myself move so i tried to drift off as i was laying on my side involuntarily tears cascaded down my face as i thought about everything that's mine i stayed there now shaking while the pain shocked my body hoping you don't leave me behind i'm hyperventilating while staring in the mirror trying to make sense of myself i'm being eaten alive by unrelenting fears because i know the person staring back at me is hell
8.
alive 02:55
i wanna die with the world i wanna know what its like to be lost i don't wanna forget what its like to feel your skin touch mine you're just too beautiful to die and we know i'm too useless to survive promise me that we're gonna stay alive cause i need you too much to die i wanna die with the world

credits

released November 2, 2019

by kelly wilhite

thank you to aidan, joel, and tristan for doing drum parts which ultimately didn't make the album

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birds fear death Dallas, Texas

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